Omega Mu Housemothers

Omega Mu Housemothers,
1911-1969

Happily, we walked through the front door of the Castle. Happily, we all lived together in the Castle. It was a fun, life-enhancing experience. Yet, happily, and with deep gratitude, we return to the Castle to see life-long friends. Our Omega Mu brotherhood and the Castle, a great union through life. A simple truth that started with a simple Q.T.V. catchphrase: “Enjoyment, sociability, and the best interests of the brothers through life.” Our fraternal continuity is strong because of these simple ideals that speak to our dedication, drive, and determination. And, as you all may know, we are approaching our 150th fraternal anniversary at the University of Maine. We are the oldest combined fraternal brotherhood at the university, and that historic truth distinguishes us from every other fraternity at Maine. That in itself is an unqualified good thing that we are proud of, rightly so. Our fraternal longevity, our life-long fraternal brotherhood, has not been achieved by luck or chance. Rather, it has been achieved through good traditions and good men living together, creating the essence of a healthy fraternal brotherhood. It is obvious, those two things transcend through all of time. That, I think, is something we must always remember. Well, we all do! 

In various modified forms, traditions, rites, and events have defined the fraternal culture and fabric of our brotherhood since our Q.T.V. years. Everything, every good tradition since our fraternal founding, created our Omega Mu culture and reflected our stated values and beliefs. Some traditions and events were more formal and charming, while others were playful and entertaining, but all the traditions were enriching and clearly showed the soul and beauty of our brotherhood. One of our outstanding traditions, understood with careful consideration, is our Omega Mu housemothers. Not often do we think about them, much less talk about them. Therefore it is appropriate and important to remember all of them because they were an essential part of our fraternal success, and we are proud of that.
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Very often, over the last several years, I have thought about one of our most noble traditions: our Omega Mu housemothers. Curiously, viewed from multiple perspectives, a fraternity is an unlikely place where you think about a motherly presence.  Because, in the generally free and loose understanding of fraternities, it is mistakenly believed that fraternities do not need an adult presence. Therefore, we do not think about our Omega Mu housemothers very much, if at all. Hence, we do not give them the consideration that they justly deserve. Therefore, they live in the shadows as being unimportant, irrelevant, unnecessary, and unremarkable within our overall fraternal history. That is unfortunate, and that is the not the historic reality of our Omega Mu housemothers. My research on our housemothers, from what I have read so far, is affirming and positive, and I would even say extraordinary. There was no negative effect on the quality and joy of our fraternal life because of presence of housemothers in the Castle. Quite the contrary, they were all remarkable, important, and necessary in helping creating the wonderful fraternal life that was experienced for thirty-one years by our Omega Mu brothers. Each of them brought richness and grace to our fraternal history by their simple presence. They were never a burden, nor did they bring any harm to our Omega Mu brotherhood. On the contrary, they helped create a rich, meaningful fraternal life for thirty-one years in the Castle, and we remain linked to all of them, proudly so, because of their gracious efforts on our behalf. They were con-natural gift to our Omega Mu brotherhood over thirty-one years, and it was a binding gift grounded in warmth, grace, empathy, and friendship on our fraternal behalf. 

Our Omega Mu housemothers were a positive and complimentary presence within our fraternal history from 1938-1969. It was a short-lived tradition, but they were fruitful and years in our history. It is historically naive to believe that these were unhappy years for generations of brothers because we had housemothers. Our housemothers were integral to our fraternal soul and character through all those seminal years in our fraternal history! Upon that fact there is no debate. Quite simply, our brotherhood thrived with the presence of each and ever housemother. They helped build our fraternal community in very practical, sane, human ways, and they improved how our Omega Mu brothers lived together through their caring presence with the brothers. Strictly speaking, our housemothers were not an authoritative, managing presence in the Castle, nor were they merely an abstract, plastic, and ornamental presence to make us look good. Far from it.  Absolutely, definitively, and concretely, they were, as I see it, an essential presence in all the right, positive ways, and the brothers respected them. 

​Our Omega Mu housemothers were mother figures, mentors, role-models, chaperones, hostesses, as well as good friends, all wrapped up in one. They were equal to all tasks, and they were not a restraining handicap on the joyful quality of life that the brothers lived in the Castle. The fraternal festivities and high-jinx did not stop. That is a fundamental truth. Each young man who lived in the Castle was entrusted to the nurturing influence and care of our housemothers, and they did so with integrity. The historic evidence is clear, having a housemother in the Castle was a good tradition, and the brothers lived with great enthusiasm. The housemothers made a positive, steadying difference in the quality of our Omega Mu life for generations of Omega Mu brothers. They stuck with us, and they took care of us. Consequently, they positively affected the lives of many Omega Mu brothers. It is for this reason that our Omega Mu housemothers are distinguished in our fraternal lineage, and we will always remember their care and dedication with appreciation and gratitude.

Starting with Mrs. Ide, and ending with Mrs Hammons, each Omega Mu housemother, in her own unique way, brought a good and gracious dimension to our Omega Mu brotherhood by their simple presence in the Castle. Their presence was real, and they had a keen interest in the overall good of the brotherhood. Some housemothers stayed only a year, while several were devoted had enthusiastic for many years. On the whole, they were not an ornamental presence in the Castle; on the contrary, they were open-hearted, generous souls in our fraternal family. Although they did not have a specific job description, they provided an essential balancing strength and charm, and in doing so they had a positive effect on our entire fraternal culture. In heart and principle, they embodied a resilient, gentle strength. Specifically, they were never were aloof and removed from the brothers and all of our traditions. They enjoyed interacting with the brothers, and in doing so they taught values by their simple presence in the Castle, at meals, at dances and formals, at mud bowls, and at all other fraternal activities. They were sociable, engaging, and wise. They were chatty with the brothers, and no doubt the brothers were spell-bound, at times, by some of the things that the housemothers talked about. Certainly, they were respectful to her when she spoke. In addition, they probably taught many life-lessons when brothers confided with them. Certainly, they were patient and kind.  At other times, as hostesses, the housemothers were welcoming and charitable to parents when they came to the Castle to visit their sons. In many instances, they would take the parents out for dinner or a play. After the advent of tv, brothers would crowd into the housemothers room to watch football or baseball games, and the room would be packed, and the housemother would be in the mix enjoying the liveliness of the time with the brothers. Although there is no evidence to affirm this, I have no doubt that the presence of our Omega Mu housemothers, at times, kept things from running too hot; and I hasten add, destructive. In sum, it was a satisfying experience having a housemother in the Castle. They kept it saner, and that is enough. In all positive, generative ways, our Omega Mu housemothers were easygoing, even-handed, wise, respectful, sensitive, and caring in all matters.  There was a definite feeling of contentment and joy with their presence in the Castle. They improved the quality of our Omega Mu fraternal life. And, lastly, their presence made the brotherhood live up to the ideals of brotherhood: academically, socially, athletically, and fraternally. Simply stated, the presence of housemothers did not diminish the quality and joy of Omega Mu fraternal life; they raised it to a more enjoyable and responsible level. 

Although not a fool-pro0f assertion on my part, the mere presence of our housemothers, I believe, created a small element of dignity and poise within the daily traditions and ritual weave of our Omega Mu brotherhood. They helped foster and sustain our traditions and rituals. One of the best time-honored traditions was escorting the housemother into the dining hall. As Jack MacBrayne recalls: "The evening meal, Monday through Friday, was an organized affair with the housemother at the head of the table and assigned waiters to serve the meal. The Sunday noon meal was a more formal affair with all the brothers wearing coat-and-tie, as I recall. There was a certain amount of decorum when the housemother was around." Fred Galella recalls: My mom and dad came up to see me in 1968. My dad was a New York cop. Clara, our house mom, took my folks to a play! It was great!" Doing all of this conveyed a sense of fraternal composure, dignity, courtesy, and respect  that is important. 

Consequently, I believe, it can be clearly affirmed that each housemother added to the bond ​​of our fraternal brotherhood because of their kind and tempering presence in the Castle. During the 147 years of our fraternal history, the presence of housemothers in the Castle, from 1938-1969, was life-enhancing in every way. Therefore, their story, within our historic Omega Mu story, is a seamless story of excellence and dedication. Their endeavors on our behalf, in generational breadth and depth, in commitment and energy, made a difference for our brotherhood, and we owe an enormous debt of gratitude to all of them. They were a blessing, a gift. And, certainly, our history would be poorer without them. But then something happened. This tradition ended during the life-changing social and political convulsions of the the late sixties. Consequently, a key element of the dignifying, and I would even say grace and civility defining, structural form of our Omega Mu fraternal life was permanently lost. It was an unfortunate shift in our fraternal history. Parenthetically, in the decades since 1969, there have been more frequent periods of negligence and compromise with regards to the upkeep of the Castle and adherence to good fraternal principles, fraternal goodwill, and good fraternal unity of purpose. These periods were destructive because the value and discipline of good, responsible traditions did not exist. The cost of their collective fraternal negligence toward the Castle was unspeakably awful. There was no sense of fraternal meaning or value, and the linked, generational sense of responsibility and stewardship toward our Phi Gamma Delta ideals, our land, and our beautiful historic home were seriously compromised by selfish, childish, destructive behavior. During these periods we became the sickening poster child example of a "frat" and not a fraternity. By whatever word you wish to use, these periods were an absolute blight on our history because the undergraduate brothers living in the Castle did not value the privilege of being an Omega Mu Fiji and living in the in the most beautiful fraternal home at the University of Maine. Simply put, they did not exercise good fraternal character at all. They did not even try. These unfortunate periods invite a sobering question: Would the Omega Mu brotherhood be better off, perhaps, to reestablish an adult presence in the Castle? It is the best approximate solution to the recurring problems we have been having over the last fifty years. All in context, at the very least, it should be considered.  But that is just me. Put it this way: it is not a dated idea.

Yes, we can all look backyard with fraternal pride for our Omega Mu housemothers, and the pleasurable shared experience it was to have them in the Castle for thirty-one years. And if we are to judge these years in absolute, concrete ways, these years were eminently enjoyable years, and the housemothers were key in helping create that enjoyment. It is not an overstatement to say that our brotherhood, broadly defined, exhibited positive fraternal value and dignity, and the presence of housemothers in the Castle helped create the best version of our Omega Mu fraternal life. It was a positive, sane tradition, and they remain a proud, permanent part of our history. We will always remember them. They were all large-hearted souls, generous and charitable, who had wonderful purpose which they all fulfilled with abiding grace. It was the real fraternal thing for thirty-one years in our Omega Mu brotherhood, and there is no doubt that our Omega Mu housemothers, with the sincerity of their simple presence in the Castle, graciously shaped our well-lived fraternal culture. And that is not a small matter. They were warm and wonderful people, and they attended to everything with a humanizing, motherly grace, and in doing so they affirmed and amplified the truth of two words we always believe in as Phi Gamma Delta Fijis: perseverance and determination. In Phi Gamma Delta spirit and form, they made a lasting contribution to our historic brotherhood because they were the very embodiment of these words, and they deserve our wholesale fraternal admiration because they embodied these traits. In a very real sense, they kept our Omega Mu brotherhood together because of their amazing grace and moxie. We are thankful for them all, and we will always remember our generous, openhearted Omega Mu housemothers with fraternal appreciation, gratitude, and respect. Perge. 

1911-1913

At this time, I do not know the name of this Omega Mu Housemother.

Mrs. Mary Bradley Ide,
Omega Mu Housemother,
​1937-1938

Mrs. Margaret A. Vickers,
Omega Mu Housemother,
​1938-1942

Mrs. Walker,
Omega Mu Housemother,
1942-1943

Mrs. Hewitt,
Omega Mu Housemother, 
1943-1944

Mrs. Houston,
Omega Mu Housemother,
1947-1948

Mrs. Neill,
Omega Mu Housemother,
1948-1949

Mrs. Maud Butts,
Omega Mu Housemother,
1949-1955

Christmas Party at the Castle for underprivileged children from Orono.

Mrs. Martha Tate,
Omega Mu Housemother,
1955-1964

Mrs. Blaisdell,
Omega Mu Housemother,
1964-1965

Mrs. Cary,
Omega Mu Housemother,
1965-1967

Mrs. Alma Pratt,
Omega Mu Housemother,
1967-1968

Mrs. Clara Hammons,
Omega Mu Housemother,
1968-1969

Our Omega Mu
Housemothers

“What if the space be long and wide,
That parts us from our brother’s side
A soul-joined chain unites our band,
And memory links us hand in hand.”
(Phi Gamma Delta fraternity song)

Fraternally,
Chip Chapman, ’82
Perge